Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

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Reads_Books
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by Reads_Books » Fri Mar 14, 2014 5:07 pm

Krulle wrote:Mylady, I am afraid that you are too old to understand simple mathematics as necessary to explain why Pi is irrational. I therefore think it would be much easier to send ou to sleep using some pills instead of me giving you a lecture you will never ever even pretend to understand.

Butler, cut me some slack!
Yes Sir. I have just cut the mooring rope on your million dollar yacht. It is now slack.

Butler, bring me an order of instant toast.
I have always imagined that Paradise would be a kind of Library

Jorges Luis Borges

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raaabr
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by raaabr » Sat Mar 15, 2014 6:24 am

Reads_Books wrote:
Krulle wrote:Mylady, I am afraid that you are too old to understand simple mathematics as necessary to explain why Pi is irrational. I therefore think it would be much easier to send ou to sleep using some pills instead of me giving you a lecture you will never ever even pretend to understand.

Butler, cut me some slack!
Yes Sir. I have just cut the mooring rope on your million dollar yacht. It is now slack.

Butler, bring me an order of instant toast.
Yes Sir. I shall throw the instant noodles in a toaster, Sir.

Butler, snipe me a Snipe and serve it to me.
Sometimes I get the feeling that If I was a goblin I would be called "Chews scenery". I have no idea why people might think that!

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GathersIngredients
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by GathersIngredients » Wed Mar 19, 2014 2:43 am

You need to be more specific, Sir. According to wikipedia a snipe is any of about 25 wading bird species in three genera in the family Scolopacidae. So please clarify which one of those nice little birdies do you want to be completely splattered all over the place by a sniper rifle projectile.

Butler, get me a jar of Jif brand peanut butter extra crunchy and a clean spoon.
Krulle wrote:My bad memory allows me to enjoy positive news far more often!
Excited for the Dungeon Eyes, Ricki and Lara kissing!
► Show Spoiler

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Krulle
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by Krulle » Wed Mar 19, 2014 2:56 am

Yes madam. Here is your jar of dried extra crunchy) peanut butter. The clean spoon might be a problem, madam, as you never did the dishes in all the years I've been working here, and we ran out of clean stuff from your wedding gifts several years ago....

Butler, go and find me some well educated rabbits which will give me company...

(the most difficult part is always to find a challenge..... at least for me. And I purposefully wrote rabbits, and not bunnies.... ;) )
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Reads_Books
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by Reads_Books » Wed Mar 19, 2014 9:53 pm

Krulle wrote:Yes madam. Here is your jar of dried extra crunchy) peanut butter. The clean spoon might be a problem, madam, as you never did the dishes in all the years I've been working here, and we ran out of clean stuff from your wedding gifts several years ago....

Butler, go and find me some well educated rabbits which will give me company...

(the most difficult part is always to find a challenge..... at least for me. And I purposefully wrote rabbits, and not bunnies.... ;) )
Of course Sir. I've just acquired these particular rabbits from a medical university. The signs above their cages said they were tested, so I'm sure they were being educated very well.

Butler, find me a smartphone that will stay charged for more than a day.
I have always imagined that Paradise would be a kind of Library

Jorges Luis Borges

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Krulle
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by Krulle » Thu Mar 20, 2014 1:16 am

Right away, Sir.
► Show Spoiler
This is one, if you care to use your brain, Sir.

Butler, find me a butler that's less witty than me!
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GathersIngredients
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by GathersIngredients » Thu Mar 20, 2014 1:30 am

Of course, Sir. Butler, I want you to clean ALL the dishes in this household. And all the cutlery, pans, pots, bowls, jars, kettles, etc., too. I still want my clean spoon!
Krulle wrote:My bad memory allows me to enjoy positive news far more often!
Excited for the Dungeon Eyes, Ricki and Lara kissing!
► Show Spoiler

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friedkitty
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by friedkitty » Sun Mar 30, 2014 7:50 am

They have all been cleaned sir. I also sealed them all into sterile sealed containers and buried them in the back yard so they will stay that way forever. Here is your spoon.

(Hands spoon sealed in block of acrylic)

Butler: would you please feed the cat.

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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by Krulle » Sun Mar 30, 2014 1:03 pm

Right away, Sir.
I also gave the pet dogs of your wife a walk, just as the pony of your daughter got his.
Simba is now fed.

Butler, read me the complete Wikipedia, plus give me an abstract of the discussion site for every article.
But be quick with it, I want to win "Who wants to be a millionaire?" next Friday!
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by raaabr » Mon Apr 07, 2014 4:47 am

*UPDATING ROBO-BUTLER CHIP*

01010010 01101001 01100111 01101000 01110100 00100000 01100001 01110111 01100001 01111001 00101100 00100000 01110011 01101001 01110010 00101110 00100000 01010000 01101001 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 00110011 00101110 00110001 00110100 00110001 00110101 00111001 00110010 00110110 00110101 00101110 00101110 001011100 1100001 00100000 01101100 01100001 01110010 01100111 01100101 00100000 01110011 01101000 01100001 01100111 01100111 01111001 00100000 01100100 01101111 01100111 00101110



Now, sir, could your puny human mind stand the full on computing power of a supercomputer reading out all of wikipedia in Binary at a faster speed than you can comprehend?


Butler, find me an endothermic fire.
Sometimes I get the feeling that If I was a goblin I would be called "Chews scenery". I have no idea why people might think that!

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Krulle
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by Krulle » Mon Apr 07, 2014 5:06 am

An endothermic fire, Sir? Right away, on this PC-screen you can have your character sit at an endothermic fire all desert day long.

Butler, give us some more players in this forum game!
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by friedkitty » Mon Apr 07, 2014 5:58 pm

I have posted links to the game on multiple sites sir. We should soon have an influx of young russian brides here to play shortly. Also a few "hot young singles " who the site claimes were ready to play.

Butler, fix me the most awesome chicken salad sandwich in the world.

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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by raaabr » Wed Apr 09, 2014 4:47 pm

I have your Chickpea salad sandwich, sir...Oh. Sir didn't ask for a Chickpea sandwich, did they?

...*Places a slice of chicken on the plate*


Butler, flip tails using this double-headed coin.
Sometimes I get the feeling that If I was a goblin I would be called "Chews scenery". I have no idea why people might think that!

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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by raaabr » Mon Apr 21, 2014 5:56 pm

Right, this thread needs a phoenix down...


Butler, get me some phoenix down!
Sometimes I get the feeling that If I was a goblin I would be called "Chews scenery". I have no idea why people might think that!

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friedkitty
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by friedkitty » Tue May 06, 2014 5:29 pm

Sorry that took so long sir...I had to catch the dolphin to superglue the coin to his tail...that didn't go over so well, by the way...but it is acomplished and said two-sided coin is now flipping tails. As for your phoenix down,... After I broke into River Phoenix's grave, the police chased me for 3 miles before I lost them. I did manage to get you just one small tuft of his hair however. Now if you don't mind, sir, I need a nap.

Butler, find me a fluffy pillow to rest my head upon!

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GathersIngredients
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by GathersIngredients » Tue May 06, 2014 8:59 pm

► Show Spoiler
There you go, Sir. It's preheated and also set to give off soothing sounds while you are using it.

Butler, I'm feeling somewhat sore in the neck and shoulder area. Give me a neck/back rub to make me feel better.
Krulle wrote:My bad memory allows me to enjoy positive news far more often!
Excited for the Dungeon Eyes, Ricki and Lara kissing!
► Show Spoiler

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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by raaabr » Thu May 08, 2014 4:36 am

You need a rub, Madam? Hold on, I need to collect the spices to make it first.


Butler, this room is so awfully dreary. Find me a beautiful bird with a beautiful cage to lighten it up.
Sometimes I get the feeling that If I was a goblin I would be called "Chews scenery". I have no idea why people might think that!

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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by Earthen » Thu May 08, 2014 7:39 pm

Here sir, this gilded cage will now be home to a stunning scarlet macaw. He's just a trifle NOISY. Ooh, and snappish.

Butler, read me the Anglo-Saxon Chronicle.
We're all mad here.

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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by GathersIngredients » Wed Jan 13, 2016 5:36 am

*reads* What?! I asked Dr. Who to lend me his copy.


Butler, analyze me how the yucky taste of the yum-yuck moss is triggered!
Krulle wrote:My bad memory allows me to enjoy positive news far more often!
Excited for the Dungeon Eyes, Ricki and Lara kissing!
► Show Spoiler

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Krulle
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by Krulle » Wed Jan 13, 2016 6:05 am

I'm very sorry, madam.
So far no specimen of the moss have survived in laboratories to be available for research. And the moss growing in your cellar has been refused by the researches as it is not clinically clean enough to be used for research, as it is contaminated by mould.

Here is your fresh plucked snack serving for today.


Butler, give me a short summary of what happened to our friend, raaabr.
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by raaabr » Wed Jan 13, 2016 10:46 am

I was here all along sir! I just went into hiding so I could pursue my education, not that you'd know about such a thing, sir.




Butler, make me a Chi-duc-key. And none of that "Turducken" nonsense!
Sometimes I get the feeling that If I was a goblin I would be called "Chews scenery". I have no idea why people might think that!

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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by Krulle » Thu Jan 14, 2016 4:49 am

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Right away sir.
*shumbles off to the kitchen to cut off a slice of the "Turducken", and rearranges the order of the meat on the dish*
There you go, Sir.
Enjoy your meal.
I have taken the liberty to also prepare Chi-urk-uck, and Tur-ick-uck for You.
As dessert I will serve Duc-hic-key, and Ducurcken.
Tomorrow will be leftover day.
*thinks: like every day since Thanksgiving*

Sir, would you like a glass of fine white portwine to accompany your lunch?


Butler, serve me my fresh page of Goblinscomic with a fine glass of Chartreuse Blanc.
That's white Chartreuse for You non-French speaking gloutons!
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GathersIngredients
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by GathersIngredients » Thu Jan 14, 2016 5:36 am

Of course, Sir. Here's the most fresh, most recent page:
► Show Spoiler
and here's your glass of Chartreuse Blanc. Never mind the aftertaste of bleach.



Butler, invent me a way to stop people from biting their nails that doesn't involve covering the nails in something yucky-tasting or have them wear mittens and suchlike all the time. Total removal of nails or teeth is also not acceptable.
Krulle wrote:My bad memory allows me to enjoy positive news far more often!
Excited for the Dungeon Eyes, Ricki and Lara kissing!
► Show Spoiler

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Quarg
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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by Quarg » Thu Jan 14, 2016 5:49 am

As you wish madam

Pulls out duck tape, adds a layer of adhesive cement. Then seals Gather's mouth shut.
"I think this will work admirably, madam,"

Butler, find the body of Jimmy Hoffa please...I need it to get a payout on this life insurance policy...
Really...why are you reading this?

Eileen Ap'Fyretorr

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Re: Butler, cut me some milk! (Open to all!)

Post by raaabr » Fri Jan 15, 2016 2:36 am

I've found him sir.You are Jimmy Hoffa. *Twist Music plays*




Butler, I hate taking my shots. Invent me a functional hypodermic needle without a sharp point!
Sometimes I get the feeling that If I was a goblin I would be called "Chews scenery". I have no idea why people might think that!

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