Page 2 of 12
Book 1, Chapter 25: Roleplaying XP
Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 2:22 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12022005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Minmax: Hey Forgath, I tought you'd be at the warcamp battle by now.
Forgath: Naw, I had to find my helmet first. What about you, did you find the chief?
Helmet: This is a helmet
Badge: MM
Beltbuckle: I am great
Minmax: No, I ended up fighting this other Goblin instead.
Badge: MM
Forgath: You know, we've taken so long getting to the warcamp, there's a chance that the Drow may have been swarmed by now. We have to accept that we might find them dead when we get there.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: Dead? Really?
Minmax: Nooooooo! Daaaamn you Goblins! Daaaamn you all to hell!
Forgath: What are you doing? You hardly know those Drow.
Forgath: You don't even like the little one.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Badge: MM
Minmax: I know. I'm trying to earn some roleplaying XP.
Badge: MM
Forgath: Herbert doesn't award roleplaying XP.
Minmax: He does so!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: No, he doesn't!
Minmax: Well, ask him then!
Forgath: Fine, I will!
Badge: MM
Forgath (Magic): Oh mighty Herbert! He who boughtith the Xbox 360 as soon as it came out, but cursed the skies when it keptith crashing! Dost thou offerith roleplaying XP?
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12032005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Hmmm... No answer.
SFX: R
Helmet: This is a helmet
SFX: UMBLE RUMBLE RUMBLE
Forgath: Uh oh.
SFX: RUMBLE RUMBLE
Minmax: Aw man! The last time there was rumbling like this, we ended up with a....
Minmax: ...Fiery Pit!
Fiery Pit: Here's your answer
Fiery Pit: your
Fiery Pit: y..ur
Forgath: Sonova crap!
Minmax: Sweet potato pudding!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Badge: MM
Beltbuckle: I am great
Not-Walter: Oh terrific. It's the little girl again.
Forgath: "Little girl"? What's he talking about?
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: oh... Uh... He's just mad cause when we last fought, I... uh... cut off his head.
Badge: MM
-
Forgath: Should I even bother with the sense motive check on that one?
Not-Walter: Look, you two can relax, OK? I'm not here to fight you this time. The great Herbert just summoned me here to say that he does infact offer XP for good roleplaying.
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12042005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Minmax (thinking): Hmm...
Badge: MM
Minmax: Hey Forgath, do we have anymore of those dried pork rations left?
Forgath: You know you ate them all, Minmax.
Badge: MM
Minmax: Nooooooo! Daaaamn you, dried pork rations! Daaaamn you all to hell!
Not-Walter: I said good roleplaying, you bald turd!
Not-Walter: Look, I did my job, so I'm outta here.
Minmax: Hey wait! You wanna stick around and help us kill some Goblins?
Not-Walter: Pffft. No Demon or Devil would ever serve a mortal unless he'd spoken that Demon's true name.
Not-Walter: And no one knows my true name!
Minmax: Really? Cool! Is your name... Uh... Richard?
Not-Richard: Sigh. No.
Forgath: I've never heard of that rule.
Not-Walter: Actually, it's a house rule.
Minmax: Is it Francis?
Forgath: So, any mortal who speaks your true name becomes your boss?
Not-Richard: Yup. Or they can banish us back to hell, it's their choice.
Minmax: Leslie! Is it Leslie?
Helmet: This is a helmet
Not-Leslie: This is why Demons and Devils guard their names so closely.
Minmax: Winkypoop the slippery Monkey! Is it Winkypoop the slippery Mon...?
Not-Walter: Will you get off of me!?
Not-Walter: I'm going back to hell. It's too cold and wet up here and people keep touching me.
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12052005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Fiery Pit: your an
Minmax: Is it Walter?
Not-Walter: What did you just say?
Minmax: I said Walter.
Badge: MM
Not-Walter: Noooo!!!!
Fiery Pit: Here's your answer
Not-Walter: Curse you, Human!! You have spoken my true name and now I must serve you for all eternity!!!
Minmax: Wow! Really?
Badge: MM
Not-Walter: Heh. No, not really. I'm only kidding.
Not-Walter: Ha ha! Yeah, right.
Not-Walter: As if "Walter" would be the name that the Ancients gave me before time began! Ha ha!
Not-Walter: That gag never gets old!
Fiery Pit: s your a
Minmax: I really hate that pit fiend.
Forgath: Heh heh. "Bald turd".
Helmet: This is a helmet
Badge: MM
Beltbuckle: I am great
Book 1, Chapter 26: Klik
Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 2:22 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12082005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Minmax: Do you see any of the Drow yet?
Forgath: Not yet. Just keep fighting!
Badge: MM
Dies Horribly (thinking): This is it! This is the day I will die horribly! I can feel it!
Dies Horribly (thinking): I've got to find a better hiding place! Those two monsters are getting closer!
-
Dies Horribly: Aaah!
Drasst Don'tsue: Another Goblin just made a fool out of me and that really pisses me off.
Drasst: I hope you don't mind, but I'm gonna take out my frustrations on you.
SFX: Punt
Drasst: Ha Ha Ha!
Dies Horribly: Oof!
Dies Horribly: ...No... ...Please...
Drasst: I'm gonna kill you in the slowest, most painful way I can! Ha Ha!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12092005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
SFX: Crunch
Dies Horribly: Aaaah!
Dies Horribly: ...
Dies Horribly: Oh God! Please!
Drasst Don'tsue: Yes, beg! Beg for mercy!
Drasst: I already said that no one makes a fool out of Drasst!
Drasst: Who's the fool now, eh Goblin?
SFX: Klik
Drasst: What is it? What are you looking at?
Drasst: What in the nine hells is that??
SFX: Klik Klik
Drasst: Get back evil creature!
SFX: Klik
SFX: Cha-Clank
Book 1, Chapter 27: Forgath's Fortune
Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 2:23 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12102005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Drasst Don'tsue: My... Scimitar?
SFX: Munch Munch Munch
SFX: Klik Klik Klik
Drasst: My Scimitar!!
Drasst: You big ugly marble!
SFX: Clanggggg
SFX: SSSSsssSSSS
Klik: REEEEEEE!!
Drasst: Mm?
SFX: SSSsssSSSsssSSSsssSSS
SFX: Splish
Drasst: Oh, someone doesn't like blood.
Drasst: Hey Goblin, get a load of...
Drasst: Hey.
Drasst: Where the hell do you think you're going?
Drasst: I'm still gonna torture you to death. And with the extra XP I'm gonna get for killing that metal thing, I'll be second level in no time!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12112005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
SFX: Klik Klik
Drasst Don'tsue: Huh?
-
SFX: Klik Klik Klik
Dies Horribly: The hell?
-
-
Dies: Get... uh,,, get b-back.
Drasst: Heh
Drasst: Heh.
Drasst: Ha Ha
Drasst: HA HA!
Drasst: Oh this is too much! A weapon that can't be swung at anything that bleeds, held by an opponent that is too much of a coward to fight. You two are a match made in heaven.
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12122005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Drasst Don'tsue: Now lower the damn sword before I...
SFX: Shunk
Drasst: !
Drasst:...
SFX: SSSssssssSSSSSSSSSSSSsssssssssssssSSSSSSSSSSSSssssssssssssSSSSSSSSSSSSssssssssssssSSSSSSSSSSSSssssssssssssSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Drasst: ...AA...
SFX: sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
SFX: SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SFX: ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
SFX: Splash
SFX: Splash
-
Dies Horribly (thinking): That kliking thing saved my life!
Dies: Are you still alive?
Dies: All these puddles have blood in them. I have to get you to some clean water.
-
[Note: I am pretty sure that the previous 3 pages should belong in the previous chapter, but Thunt currently divides otherwise, according to his Archive page]
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12132005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Young and Beautiful (thinking): This battle is lost. Almost everyone is dead. And yet, I sense an even greater danger still coming. A paladin cursed with...
Forgath: You three Goblins! Stop wrestling under that blanket and come out and fight!
-
Forgath: Whoa! Damn, that's ugly!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Young And Beautiful: And so Forgath, worshipper of He Who Hides Behind A Screen Of Paper, it comes to this. Two divine spellcasters, locked in deadly battle. You see, every Goblin clan has a fortune teller. A seer of the future. A possessor of power. You face this clan's fortune teller now, Dwarf!
Forgath: No seriously, that's like some new kind of ugly!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Y&B: I wield the power of Maglubiyet! God of Goblins! He who has crossed the pain-river of Bile! He who demands...
Forgath: I mean damn! I'm getting nauseous just looking at you and I'm a freaking Dwarf!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Y&B: Alright! I'm ugly! I get it! Can we please just...
Y&B: Wait a second...
Y&B: I'm having a vision.
Y&B: You will not die this day.
Forgath: I will not die this day? Lady, you gotta work on your pre-combat trash talk. Try something like...
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: There is no escape, feeble Dwarf!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12142005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Forgath: That one is a classic.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Young and Beautiful: I know that you will not die this day because I have seen your death. You will die in a great battle with another dwarf.
Y&B: When the serpent becomes your prey, friends will become enemies and love will fuel hate.
Forgath: Okay, you're officially creeping me out now.
Forgath: Herbert...
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath (Magic): Magic Weapon!
SFX: Foom
Helmet: This is a helmet
Y&B: Maglubiyet...
Y&B (Magic): Magic Weapon!
SFX: Foom
Forgath: I cast upon you...
Forgath (Magic): Bless Water!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Y&B: ?
SFX: Foom
Y&B: Bless Water? What the hell was that?
Forgath: Gimme a break. I'm a first level cleric. I don't have a lot to work with.
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12152005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Young and Beautiful: True, but you can do a lot better than Bless Water. What about Summon Monster?
Forgath: Pffft. You mean Summon Monster One.
Forgath: Oooooo! Look out everyone, I summoned a fricken Badger!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Y&B: Fine! I'll show you how it's done. I cast upon you...
Y&B (Magic): Doom!
Forgath: Aaah!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Hmm?
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Well, that didn't do much.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Y&B: What are you talking about? You now suffer a temporary -2 on attacks, damage, saves, and checks! You've got to admit, that's very annoying!
Forgath: Ya, but with a name like "Doom", I was expecting something grander, my skin ripped from my bones and my soul tossed into hell. That sorta thing.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Y&B: Well, "Very Annoying" doesn't really roll off the tongue as a spell title.
Forgath: Oh, to hell with all of this. I'll just crush your skull.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Book 1, Chapter 28: Forgath vs The Fortune Teller
Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 2:23 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12162005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Forgath: Raaaa!!
Helmet: This is a helmet
SFX: Kwak
Young and Beautiful: Aaah!!
SFX: Clang
Helmet: This is a helmet
SFX: Whap
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
Y&B: Do you even know why we Goblins build warcamps away from our villages? It's because adventurers like you are always hunting us down! If it weren't for these warcamps, you'd be killing our women and children for your precious XP!
Forgath: You make it sound as though Goblins never do anything wrong! I've heard the stories of how ancient, dwarfen clans have been wiped out by your kind!
Helmet: This is a helmet
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12172005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Young and Beautiful: Oh I won't deny that there are many Goblins clans that'd rather rip out your throat than say hello. But ask yourself, has the clan that you're attacking now done anything evil?
Forgath: What?
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
-
Minmax: Ha!
Goblin: Aaah!
Goblin: No! Oh please no!!
Goblin: Gak...
Belt: I am great
Forgath: But...
Helmet: This is a helmet
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12182005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Forgath: We're the good guys...
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath:... aren't we?
Helmet: This is a helmet
SFX: Thunk
Forgath: Aah!
Helmet: This is a helmet
SFX: Thwack
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: You damned, ugly bag of warts! I almost fell for your lies!
Forgath: Hmm?
Helmet: This is a helmet
-
Forgath: Oh, you're not getting away from me!
Helmet: This is a helmet
-
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12192005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Forgath (thinking): Where the hell did you go?
Helmet: This is a helmet
SFX: Thapp
SFX: Whap
Young and Beautiful: Y'know, I have been a part of three warcamps before this one!
Y&B: And even though they've always been wiped out, I've always survived because I don't do the fighting! I let the other Goblins die like idiots and then I return to the village as a clan hero!
Y&B: You hear me?! I'm not supposed to be doing the fi...
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath (Magic): Inflict Light Wounds!
Y&B: AAAAAAAAAAAA....
Y&B: ...AAAAAAAaaa...
Y&B: ...aaaaa...
Y&B: ...
-
-
-
-
Book 1, Chapter 29: Fumbles Fumbles
Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 2:25 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12232005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Minmax: So is that it then? Did we win?
Forgath: Well I think there are a few survivors still running around here somewhere, but basically ya, these Goblins got spanked big time.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: Yes! Then it's time to hit that poorly locked treasure chest! I call first dibs!
Badge: MM
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: What are you, twelve? You can't just "call dibs". It goes by a system of necessity compared with practicality.
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Turn and face justice, adventurers! For you now stand before the full fury of...
Fumbles (SVK): ... Senor Vorpal Kickass'o!
Flag: ers oon adv Bra
Minmax: Senor what?
Forgath: Did he say Vorpal Sick Ass?
Fumbles (SVK): WAAA!
Flag: The adventurers of Brassmoon City
Fumbles (SVK): Oof!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12252005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Bird: Skwaaaa!
Beltbuckle: I am great
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Oof!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Beltbuckle: I am gre
Bird: Skwaaa!
Fumbles (SVK): Waaaaa!
Minmax: Ooooo!
Forgath: Ouch!
Beltbuckle: I am great
Helmet: This is a helmet
Badge: MM
Fumbles: Huff
Fumbles: Huff
Minmax: Now that's what I call a fumble. It's like an art form for this guy.
Forgath: I just wanna know what kind of fumble chart he's using, so that I can avoid it.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: So what do you think, should I bother killing him?
Forgath: Naw, with fumbles like these, this one'll probably end up killing himself within a week or so.
Badge: M
Beltbuckle: I am
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Besides, he's harmless.
Book 1, Chapter 30: Fumbles vs The Purple Worm
Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 2:27 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12302005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Minmax: Alright, let's hit the poorly locked...
Minmax: Aaah!
SFX: Thud
Helmet: This is a helmet
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Aha! You just got your ass handed to you by Senor Vorpal...
Fumbles (SVK): ...KiiAaack!
Minmax: I'm gonna rip you apart, Goblin!
Badge: MM
Forgath: Heh heh. Don't take it so personally, Minmax. He's just trying to defend his home.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: Ow! Dammit!
Badge: MM
Minmax: You piece of quivering Troll dung!
Badge: MM
Forgath (thinking): I suppose they've all been defending their home.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Belt: I am great
Minmax: Hey!
Forgath (thinking): Hmm...
Helmet: This is a helmet
Belt: I am great
Minmax: Get the hell outta my backpack!
Badge: MM
Forgath: Minmax, what evil deeds were these Goblins commiting?
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: What are you talking about?
Minmax: We're first level adventurers. They're first level monsters. The whole situation is pretty self explanatory, I think.
Badge: MM
Forgath: Ya, but was this particular clan attacking passing merchants or maybe raiding some nearby village or something?
Minmax: What the hell has gotten into you?
Fumbles (SVK): Aha!
SFX: Clunk
Badge: MM
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/12312005/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Minmax: Alright, I'm done screwing around with you!
Beltbuckle: I am great
Badge: MM
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Waaaa!
Fumbles (SVK): Senor Vorpal Kickass'o says piss off!
Beltbuckle: I am great
Minmax: Crap, I don't wanna stab holes into my own backpack.
Minmax: Just get out so I can kill you, dammit.
Minmax: Heh heh.
Minmax: Make a wish, freak.
Beltbuckle: I am great
Fumbles (SVK): Aaaah! A purple worm! Have at thee foul beast!
Minmax: Oh god.
SFX: Yank
Minmax: Aaaaaaaaah!!!
Fumbles (SVK): Senor Vorpal Kickass'oooooo!
Forgath: Wow. You got your ass kicked by a goblin who's even dumber than you.
Minmax: Shut up. I'm making a fortitude save to not puke.
Book 1, Chapter 31: The Rules Just Changed
Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 2:32 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01062006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Minmax: It's gorgeous.
Forgath: Truly a thing of beauty.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Badge: MM
Minmax or Forgath: The poorly locked treasure chest!
Minmax: Wow, check it out! It's not even locked at all!
Forgath: Careful, there might be traps.
Minmax: Oh please Forgath, this is the wonderful land of first level adventurers. Where there are no lethal traps and the monsters never, ever use their own magic...
Badge: MM
Minmax: ... items?
Minmax: Aaah!
Forgath: Minmax!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: But... You're not supposed to...
Minmax: ...the rules...
Badge: MM
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01072006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Complains of Names: The rules just changed.
Minmax: All right, let's end this, Names.
Badge: MM
SFX: Ca-click
Forgath: Don't worry, Minmax, I got yer ...
Helmet: This is a helmet
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01092006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
SFX: Clang Thump
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Oof!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
-
-
Chief: Oh crap!
-
Chief: Aah!
Big Ears: Oof!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01102006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Forgath: Yes!
Forgath: Ha ha!
Helmet: This is a helmet
-
Forgath: I am freakin unbeatable!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: Yaaaaah!
Badge: MM
Beltbuckle: I am great
SFX: Chiiiing
SFX: Cha-Ching-Ca-kling
-
Minmax (thinking): As long as Names has those magic items, I don't know if I can beat him!
Minmax: Huff
Minmax: Huff
Minmax: ?
Sign: Sacred Do not enter without permission from the chief or the fortune teller!!
Book 1, Chapter 32: Sacred Statues
Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 2:34 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01132006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: No!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: I'll kill you for that!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Aah!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Rrrr
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Okay then...
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01142006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Forgath:... who dies first?
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: Dammit, I wish I could read.
Minmax: Huh?
Sign: Sacred Do not enter without permission from the chief or the fortune teller!!
Badge: MM
Beltbuckle: I am great
SFX: Smash
Badge: MM
Minmax: Oof!
Badge: MM
SFX: Clang
Minmax: Aah!
Statue: Eats Anyting - Killed by a sixth le(vel Fighter)
Statue: Happy Coincidence - Killed by a third level rogue
Statue: Eats Anyting - Killed by a sixth level F(ighter)
Statue: Listens intently - Killed by a fifth level wizard
Statue: Runs with scissors - killed by a third level fighter
Statue: Chief Kills a werebear - killed by a seventh level barbarian
Statue: Too Say to Snow ... - killed by a f... figther
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01152006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Minmax: Nnnuh!
Belt: I am great
Badge: MM
Badge: MM
Minmax: Rrryuh!
Statue: ML Killed by Level MO
Beltbuckle: I am great
Badge: MM
-
Minmax: Naah!
Badge: MM
Belt: I am .reat
Statue: Kil le
SFX: Thunk
Complains of Names: What's the matter, Minmax? Is murdering my kind not fun anymore?
Minmax: NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
Badge: MM
Minmax: NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNames!!!
Book 1, Chapter 33: A Tragic Mistake
Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 2:36 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01202006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Big Ears: Uuh!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Raaa!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
Thaco: Fumbles, look out!
Forgath: Aaah!
SFX: Crunch
Thaco: Aaarh!
Helmet: This is a helmet
SFX: Crakk
Helmet: This is a helmet
SFX: Thwack
Helmet: This is a helmet
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01212006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Big Ears: Thaco!
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): No.
Thaco: coff.
Lifepoints: -8
Forgath: You cut my helmet, Goblin! For that, I'm personally gonna finish you off!
Helmet: This is a helmet
-
Chief: You... you... get the hell away from him, Dwarf!
Thaco: No. The warcamp is lost. Just get out of here.
Chief: No!
Thaco: Now you listen to me, you stupid boy! There ain't nothing that can save me now! You three run and get my son away form that human monster! You get my son and you get outta here!
Thaco: Just don't let him hurt my son, okay?
Thaco: Please.
Lifepoints: -9
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01222006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Raaaa!
Helmet: This is a helmet
-
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath (magic): Cure Minor Wounds!
-
Forgath: Huff
Forgath: Huff
Forgath: That's all the magic I have left. It won't do much, but it'll stabilize you and stop you from bleeding to death.
Forgath: I think we've made a tragic mistake.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Book 1, Chapter 34: The Beginning
Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 2:40 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01272006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Complains of Names: I once heard that getting cut by an enchanted blade actually hurts less than a regular blade because it's sharper.
Statue: Y izard
Names: I wouldn't know, though.
Badge: MM
-
Minmax: Raaa!
SFX: Cwaang
Badge: MM
Names: You've lost a lot of blood. You can't even stand anymore.
Minmax: Oof!
Badge: MM
Names: I want you to know exactly what it feels like to be the victim, Minmax. To be hunted.
Statue: Chi bear
Statue: Killed th lev
Beltbuckle: I am great
Badge: MM
Names: Before you die, I want you to feel what my kind feels.
Statue1: Chances a fifth level nter
Statue2: Tempts Death lled by a fourth level
Statue: Chief ebear Killed enth lev an
Beltbucke: I am great
Badge: MM
Minmax: hhnnn!
Badge: MM
Statue: Chi ear Killed h lev
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01282006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Complains of Names: !
Names: Oh.
Names: That's clever.
Names: Aaah!
Minmax: Uh!
Statue: Liste Killed
Names: Aa-Aah!
SFX: Ca-Click
Statue: Liste Killed
Minmax: I...
Badge: MM
Minmax: ...am Minmax...
Minmax: ...the unstoppable Warrior!
Beltbuckle: I am great
Badge: MM
SFX: Clang
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01292006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Beltbuckle: I am great
Badge: MM
Minmax: Wha...?
Badge: MM
Minmax: Aah! get it off!
Badge: MM
Complains of Names: What the hell is going on here?
Chief: Complains!
Forgath: Minmax!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Thaco: Gods help us, it's the Shield of Wonder. We're all in great danger!
Statue: Listens-Intently Killed by a fifth level wizar
Statue: Eats-Anything Killed by sixth level figth
Minmax: Forgath!
Minmax: Help me! Please!
Forgath: Hang on, Minmax! I'm on my way!
Helmet: This is a helmet
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01302006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Thaco: No Forgath! Don't get too close!
Forgath: It's okay, I've saved him from tentacles before.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Nnnuuh!
Complains of Names: Thanks!
Statue: List Killed
SFX: Ca-Click
Complains: Now let's go finish those bastards off!
Forgath: I think it's some kind of entanglement spell!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
Complains: Now you die, adventurers!
Big Ears: Complains wait! Something's happened!
Complains: What are you talking about? Let go of me!
Big Ears: It's something that's never happened before and we all have to decide what to do. We have to talk.
Complains: I know what to do! They have to die for the Goblins they've killed!
Complains: And if you don't understand that, fine. But stay out of my way!
Big Ears: Dammit Complains! Don't act like you're the only one who's lost something today! One Eye was my best friend since birth and if I can stop and think about what I'm doing before I create more death, then so can you, you selfish bastard!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/01312006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
-
-
SFX: Kwak
Complains of Names: You think One Eye would want you to "Stop and think" while they kill more Goblins?
Complains: You think they "Stopped and Thought" before they did that to my father? You think they showed any mercy?
Names: This is a battle for our lives and I don't have time to cater to your conscience, Ears.
Chief: Complains, you don't understand! The Dwarf...
Complains: No! Let go of me!
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): That sticky stuff is grabbing everything! We have to get away while we still can!
Complains: Nooo!
Complains: I swear I'll kill you, Minmax! I swear it!! Do you hear me?! You're dead!!
Minmax: I'll find you, Names! You can't run from me! I'll wipe out your whole god damned race!!
-
Book 2, Chapter 1: Dodge
Posted: Fri Mar 01, 2013 1:54 pm
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/02032006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Big Ears: I'm back.
Big Ears: There isn't much out there...
Big Ears: ...but I managed to find some Blackroot and some Grass Maggots.
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Grass Maggots! Cool!
Big Ears: Is Complains still off talking to Chief?
Thaco: Yup. For over an hour now.
Thaco: I imagine he's in a lot of trouble, using the contents of the poorly locked chest, disobeying Chief's order to cease combat...
Thaco: ...hitting you.
Big Ears: I'll live. As long as I've known Complains, he's always had a temper. I guess watching so many Goblins die just pushed him too far.
Fumbles (SVK): Well on the up side, I gained a level!
Big Ears: Goblins don't go up levels.
Thac0: Apparently, this one declared himself a player character just before battle.
Big Ears: You can do that?
-
Fumbles (SVK): And since I'm now 2/11th of a level in every class, I got a new feat!
Big Ears: Which class gives you a feat at 2/11ths of a level?
Fumbles (SVK): I dunno. When you have this many classes, you don't ask questions about where the bonuses come from.
Fumbles (SVK): Wanna hear what feat I took?
Big Ears or Thaco: No.
Fumbles (SVK): Dodge! Once I declare who I'm dodging, my armour class gets a +1 if that person attacks me during that round!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/02042006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): The drawbacks are that I can only declare it on one person at a time and if I don't declare it, I don't get the bonus.
Thaco: Well in my days, we...
Fumbles (SVK): I declare my Dodge on you!
Thaco: Gaa!
Big Ears: What are you doing? Thaco's not going to attack you!
Fumbles (SVK): I know, but the rules say that if I don't declare dodge every round, I lose the feat.
Big Ears: I think you're misunderstanding the...
Fumbles (SVK): I declare my Dodge on you, Big Ears!!
Thaco: Wait a minute! How in the nine hells did you go up a level after just one battle?
Fumbles (SVK): Because I single handedly defeated Minmax and his purple worm familiar, that's how!
Big Ears: Fumbles, I still think that you're only supposed to declare Dodge during combat. It's not like you're expected to declare it every six seconds for the rest of your ...
Fumbles (SVK): I declare my Dodge on you!!
SFX: Whap
Fumbles (SVK): Hey!
Fumbles (SVK): I declare my Dodge on you, Thaco!!
SFX: Whap
Thaco: Heh
Thaco: heh
Big Ears: Ha
Big Ears: Ha
Fumbles (SVK): Alright, cut it out.
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/02052006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Chief: ..so he actually saved Thaco's life, Complains.
Complains of Names: Well, that's great, but let's not forget that he's also the one who beat him into negative hit points in the first place.
Chief: Look, no one is saying that this Dwarf should go unpunished for all the death he's caused.
Complains: Then what are you saying?
Chief: I don't know. This is completely new for our clan. So is you using those magic items.
Complains: Hey, I saved lives by...
Chief: Of course you saved lives! That's not the point! Look, our ancestors had to fight adventurers too. And they did it while maintaining our traditions. They died for our ways.
Chief. And the moment you picked up that +1 short sword and that shield, you said that your life was more important than all of our ancestors.
Complains: Chief, you know that's not how I...
Chief: If you start proving our rules as pointless, then you're proving that countless Goblins heroes... legends that we look to for inspiration, all died pointless deaths.
Chief: And I won't believe that they... that my father, Chief Kills-a-Werebear, died for some meaningless rule when all he had to do was pick up some treasure out of the poorly locked chest.
Complains: ...
Chief: Look, you know what this means, don't you? When you used our clan's treasure, you fought like an adventurer. And that means that when you eventually die, you'll be forgotten like an adventurer and no statue can ever be carved in your memory.
Complains of Names: I know. I knew it when I climbed into that chest. I can never again have honour in our clan.
Complains: "Not quite an outcast, but no longer a member..."
Chief: "...an empty Goblin amoung us. For this is our law."
Chief: I'm so sorry, Complains.
Complains. You're doing what you have to. I know that as chief, you often have to do things that aren't easy. You have to show more courage than any of us. I understand.
Goblin (Flashback): Chief... Help us... Please...
Chief: Ya...
Chief: ...right.
-
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): I declare my Dodge on this Grass Maggot!!
Big Ears: Dammit Fumbles, it doesn't work that way!
panel 3: amoung=among ? Spelling error?
Book 2, Chapter 2: Chief's Secret
Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2013 12:05 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/02102006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Chief: I guess we'd better get going. It's an eight day hike back to village.
-
Complains of Names: It's not your fault that we lost that battle, y'know.
Chief: Isn't it?
Complains: Of course not. Every chief has had to deal with the loss of a warcamp or two.
Chief: Complains, you know how you always tease me and say that the only reason I'm chief is because it's my name?
Complains: Hey, I just like to complain. And obviously, complaining about names is what I...
Chief: Well you're right.
Chief: I'm not the real chief of our clan. I'm a liar.
Complains of Names: What are you talking about? Everyone knows that when a chief dies, the fortune teller uses her magics to see who would make the best chief of our clan. It usually ends up being the child of the previous chief and since you were Kills-a-Werebear's son, it was an obvious choice.
Complains: You were officially chosen by our fortune teller. You are our chief.
Chief: There's more to it than that. I was just an infant when my father died in battle. The fortune teller used her magics and found the Goblin destined to lead us to glory. But it wasn't me. Her powers of seeing into the future showed her that if this other Goblin was made chief, there would be a great civil war in our clan.
Chief: A battle between those who follow the fortune teller's decision and those who think that I should lead due to my bloodline. Kills-a-Werebear was the best chief we've ever had and a lot of Goblins would refuse to follow anyone except his offspring.
Chief: This war... This battle amongst our own kind, was to be the end of our clan forever
Chief: My naming ceremony hadn't happened yet. So the fortune teller named me Chief, tattooed my face with the traditional markings of leadership and announced that I was the best choice. She knew that I would never be a great chief, but it was the only way to avoid the war and save the clan.
Chief: This is why our clan has declined in the nine years that I've ruled. Why under Kills-a-Werebear's rule, our clan fought the adventurers of a much higher level and therefore was attacked far less often, allowing us more peace. It's why we used to strike fear in the hearts of adventurers as far off as Brassmoon City. Now we're just some anonymous clan in the woods who first level adventurers constantly use as practice. We're a joke now and it's all because I'm no chief.
Complains of Names: I... I can't... believe it.
Complains: It can't be true.
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/02112006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Chief: None of us will even say the name of our clan anymore, it carries too much shame.
Complains of Names: Ya, I remember when I was young, the warriors would shout the name of our clan during battle to give them courage.
Chief: If this got out, it would destroy the clan. But after that battle, I had to tell someone. You can keep this to yourself, right?
Complains: Ya... I guess so.
Big Ears: Give me back my Blackroot, Fumbles!
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): I declare my Dodge on your ability to take back the Blackroot!
Big Ears: You don't even understand your own feat!
Fumbles (SVK): Yes I do! I declare Dodge on your smelly, yellow butt!
Big Ears: You are a Halfling's wee wee away from having that moustache shoved up your ass!
Chief: What the hell is going on here?
-
Fumbles (SVK): Lunch.
Big Ears: Ya. Plus we're discussing the progression of Senor Vorpal Kickass'o.
Thac0: And I've been trying to decide if this is entertaining or annoying.
Complains of Names: So how are you feeling?
Thaco: I'll be okay. I'm more concerned about you walking around with that shield.
Complains: What?
Thaco: You have no idea what that thing does, do you?
Big Ears: I do.
Big Ears: It hurts my face.
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/02122006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Thaco: That there, is a Shield of Wonder. If, while it's wielded, a melee weapon strikes it's outer surface, a random, magical event occurs.
Thaco: It could spew forth green flames that cook your opponent or it could turn him into a red Dragon! Ya never know!
Complains of Names: Well this thing saved my life against Minmax!
Thaco: Cause you got lucky!
Thaco: Next time, a gate to Hell could open right under your feet! Or it could explode and kill us all! That thing should be buried!
Thaco: "Do you have any idea what happened to the adventurer who brought it into the warcamp?"
SFX: Clang
SFX: Ka-Crunch
Elf: AAAAH!!
-
-
-
Thaco: "The shield returned to it's natural state after a few rounds, but it took us all afternoon to clean up what was left of that poor Elf."
Complains of Names: Well I need it for now. I know that clan procedure is for all surviving members of a wiped out warcamp to head back to the village, and if you guys want to do that, that's fine.
Complains: But I'm going back for Minmax. I'm gonna hunt him down and this time nothing is going to stop me.
Book 2, Chapter 3: The Party Forms
Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2013 1:34 pm
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/02172006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Thaco: You're not going after Minmax!
Chief: Ya, do you want to get killed?
Complains of Names: In case you guys didn't notice, I was about to kick some serious ass in the last battle before you dragged me away.
Big Ears: And before that, you were trapped under a statue.
Thaco: Besides, Forgath and Minmax are probably level two now, which means they're even more powerful.
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Just like me, Senor Vorpal Kickass'o!
Complains: And once again, we Goblins stay relatively the same while all the damn adventurers in the world keep going up levels.
Fumbles (SVK): It's too bad the rest of you aren't player characters like me.
Big Ears: And what about Forgath? I mean, he's pro Goblin now, right?
Chief: Well it's great that he suddenly felt bad about attacking us, but do we really want to just ignore the fact that he killed a hell of a lot of Goblins?
Thaco: Sigh. No one's saying that.
Complains of Names: Look, if the Dwarf stays out of my way, I'll leave him alone. But if he tries to help Minmax...
Thaco or Chief: Complains, if he helps Minmax, you're dead!
Big Ears: And he will help him!
Fumbles (SVK): We'd be this Goblin party that could go on dungeon crawls to gain XP, become high leveled, and keep our clan safe.
Thaco: What?
Chief: What did you say?
Big Ears: Huh?
Fumbles (SVK): What? What did I say?
Complains: Y'know, that's not a bad idea. I could spend some time going up a few levels and then go after Minmax.
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/02182006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Thaco: We'd have the power to actually stop adventurers. Even the cocky, high leveled ones.
Chief: Whoa! Whoa! Guys, you're talking about becoming exactly what we hate!
Complains of Names: Not at all! No one's talking about attacking villages and killing for XP. We're talking about stopping adventurers from doing just that!
Chief: Well what about the danger? We could all be killed!
Complains: Oh, you're right, let's all go back to the village and start plans for the next warcamp where we can all wait for more adventurers to come and kill us. That's much safer!
Complains: Hey Fumbles, is there a class that specializes in sarcasm? Cause I should totally be that!
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Oh that's right, you'd all have to choose classes. Well... Uh...
Fumbles (SVK): ...Big Ears, any ideas what you wanna be?
Big Ears: Oh Geez...
Big Ears: ...Well...
Big Ears (Flashback): One Eye?
-
Big Ears: I want the power to stop innocents from dying. To protect others instead of just standing around helplessly.
Big Ears: What? Is that a dumb answer? It's stupid, right?
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/02192006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Congratulations Big Ears, you're now a first level paladin.
Big Ears: Really? I am?
Chief: Now hang on just a second!
Fumbles (SVK): Thaco, what sort of class did you have in mind?
Thaco: Oh, I don't know...
Dellyn Goblinslayer (Flashback): Is he tied up tight?
Guard (Flashback): As tight as I could make it, Dellyn.
Dellyn (Flashback): Good. Now then Thaco, I'm going to start by cutting of an ear...
Thaco: Escape Bonds. Which classes can do that?
Fumbles (SVK): Monks can do that.
Thaco: Monks? Don't you have to come from a monastery?
Fumbles (SVK): Just consider yourself a monastery of one.
Thaco (thinking): Cool.
Chief: So that's it then? We're just gonna pee all over our laws now?
Fumbles (SVK): Well technically, it's not against our law to become a player character.
Chief: That's because our laws were written in first edition.
Fumbles (SVK): It's also not against our laws to use any magic items we'd find since it's said that we can't use what adventurers bring into our warcamps.
Fumbles (SVK): So Mr. Temper, will you be playing a raging barbarian then?
Complains of Names: What? I don't have a temper.
-
SFX (All laughing): Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha
Big Ears: "I'll get you Minmax! I swear by the foam coming out of my mouth that I'll get yoooouuuu!"
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/02202006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Complains of Names: Oh please. Like any of you have never gotten mad during a battle.
Goblin: It's not just during battles.
Complains of Names (Flashback): Hawl, I'm not trading you for this big ass sword!
Complains (Flashback): It's called size modifier! Look it up!
Complains of Names (Flashback): Where the hell are my Pewter Incarnations of Various Monsters and Adventurers?
Eats Anything (Flashback): Not now, I just ate some really jagged candies.
Complains (Flashback): What kind of name is Shaken-Unfairly??
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): If you're a Barbarian, that temper can become a Berserker Rage and give you some sweet bonuses.
Complains: Hmmm. That could really work for me.
Fumbles (SVK): Chief, what about you?
Chief: I want no part of this.
Fumbles (SVK): C'mon, we really could use your help.
Chief: Sigh.
Chief: fine. I'll be something that stays out of the way and never has to do anything exciting, but is still pestered by everyone in the group.
Fumbles (SVK): Woo Hoo! We have a cleric!
Fumbles (SVK): Then it's official. We are this realm's first ever, party of adventuring Goblins!
Book 2, Chapter 4: The Belt Buckle
Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2013 1:40 pm
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/02242006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
-
-
Minmax: What the hell are you doing?
Minmax: You're supposed to be helping me find a weapon that isn't all dented or covered in rust. Not nerding it up with a bunch of dusty scrolls!
Badge: MM
Forgath: Relax tough guy. Those tentacle things have all melted away and the goblins are gone. So you might want to rest a bit. Besides, this was the fortune teller's hut and I'm trying to learn about this clan.
Minmax: What the hell for? Great adventurers have songs written about how they fought with kick ass weapons, not how they were good readers.
Badge: MM
Minmax: And I'm a great adventurer. Says so right here on my belt buckle.
Beltbuckle: I am great.
Badge: MM
Forgath: Yeah, I've been meaning to ask you about that. How do you know what your buckle says, if you can't read?
Minmax: I had it made special in some village. I paid the blacksmith an extra three gold to carve "I am great" in it. He told me that's what it says.
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/02252006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Badge: MM
Beltbuckle: I am great
Minmax: That is what it says, right?
Badge: MM
Forgath: Nope. It says that you're sexually attracted to small animals.
Minmax: What?!?
Forgath: And then it goes to say that you soil yourself often, your real name is Bitchy McWhine and you're the willing property of someone named Dominant Ted.
Minmax: Sonova crap! I'm gonna kill that blacksmith! I'm a second level fighter now and I deserve better treatment than...
Badge: MM
Minmax: Hmm?
Badge: MM
Beltbuckle: I am great
-
Badge: MM
Minmax: That is so ass what you just did. That is totally ass.
Book 2, Chapter 5: Klik Lends A Hand
Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2013 1:46 pm
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/03032006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Dies Horribly: Huff
Dies: Huff
Dies: Huff
Dies: Huff
Dies: I just need to rest for a moment, then I'll try to clean you off.
Dies: Uh.
Dies: I feel sick and this wound hurts too much.
Dies: In case you're wondering, these are Goblin arrows in these dead Humans, but they're not from our clan, so don't go blaming me, ok?
Dies: Long ago, this area belonged to the Viper clan. Goblins who loved raiding passing merchants and caravans.
Dies: Apparently when I was a baby and when we were on the eve of war with the Viper clan, Chief Kills-A-Werebear made a deal of peace...
SFX: Crunch
Dies: ...and they moved further south.
Dies: To this day, you can still find a lot of dead Humans, Halflings and...
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/03042006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Dies Horribly: Hey, eating metal, instantly heals you up? That's a (coff) handy trick.
SFX: Klik
Dies: It's really getting cold out he...
SFX: Klik Klik
SFX: Thump
-
SFX: Klik Klik Klik
SFX: Klik Klik
SFX: Runch
-
-
Dies: Wha?
Dies: Oh thanks, but it doesn't work like that for Goblins.
Dies: I think I'm bleeding too much. It's getting hard to stay awake.
Book 2, Chapter 6: Yumyuck Moss
Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2013 1:55 pm
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/03102006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Forgath: Well, I found my backpack, it was by the lake. Did you find any usable weapons yet?
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: There's a bit of coin in here, but that's it. Names took the only weapon in the chest.
Badge: MM
Beltbuckle: I am great
Minmax: I mean look at this crap he left us! A mug? What am I supposed to do, hit people up side the head with a freakin mug?
Badge: MM
Minmax: Lame.
Badge: MM
SFX: Kunk
Forgath: Ow!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Watch it, you Hill Giant's ass hair! I almost dropped this!
Minmax: Oh no, a dusty clay pot. That was a close one.
Badge: MM
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath:This dusty pot contains Yumyuck Moss. Highly prized by Dwarves!
Minmax: Your race collects moss? Tell me again how Dwarves got their reputation for being so tough?
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Yumyuck Moss grows in dank caves and is very rare. I found this pot of it in the fortune teller's hut.
Minmax: What do you do with it?
Badge: M
Beltbuckle: I am great
Forgath: You eat it.
SFX: Sniff Sniff
Minmax: Smells sweet. Like berries.
Badge: .M
Beltbuckle: I am
Minmax: Mmm!
Minmax: Hey, this stuff is really good!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/03112006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: There's the "
yum"...
Minmax: This might be the best thing I've ever...
Badge: MM
Minmax:
!
Minmax:
Blaa! It tastes
terrible! Oh Gods, help me!
Badge: MM
Forgath: ...and there's the "
yuck". Heh heh.
Minmax: It's like a hell in my mouth and everyone's been
damned!
Badge: MM
Minmax: You dwarves actually
eat that crap?
Badge: MM
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Yeah, but we're usually drunk.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Hey, Minmax, listen to this... "And if the White Terror should fly again, pain and death be unto all non Goblins. For once the Terror has her wing, Goblins shall rule this realm."
paper scroll wrote:it is the blue
such is found she
slave labour to dig a
is the way of clan Viper
Badge: MM
Minmax: Whoa. You mean these monsters were trying to summon some terror thing? Do you know what that means? We didn't just take out some Goblin ...
Minmax: ... we saved the freakin
world! Whatever this "White Terror" is, we stopped them from summoning it or giving it a wing or something!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Beltbuckle: . am great
Badge: MM
Minmax:
Yes! Bards are gonna write songs about us! Tavern wenches are gonna sleep with us!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Well, it does say that Goblins have been trying to make this happen.
Badge: MM
Beltbuckle: I am great
Minmax: Well, they'll sleep with me. You always seem to have that gamey
Dwarf smell.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: But it doesn't make sense.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: I saw an older Goblin try to save some younger ones with no regard for his own life. I watched a bunch of them sacrifice themselves to save their chief.
Forgath: This world domination thing just doesn't seem like them.
Badge: MM
Minmax: Oh and I guess you got to know them
real well while you were crushing their skulls!
Badge: MM
Minmax: What is
with you and wanting to make friends with these monsters anyway? Did you happen to notice how Names swore a damn
death oath on me? Him and his gang are probably trying to raise this White Terror now!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/03122006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Minmax: If you're having doubts about their evilness, just read the scroll. It's all there in black and white.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: This scroll is yellow.
Minmax: Whatever!
Minmax: We are the only adventurers who know about their plans and it's up to us to hunt down those few who got away and make sure that the "White Terror" plan never happens! Plus, any Goblin who swears a death oath on Minmax is dead meat! I don't care how long it takes!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: I just thought...
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: I just thought that maybe we were wrong about them. They had me believing that they were good.
Minmax: I know Forgath, but these are Goblins. They steal babies in the night. They attack villages. They are evil.
Badge: MM
Caption: Later...
Minmax: So I packed up what was of the chest. You ready to go?
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Yeah. It'll be slow going at first with all these wounds of our, but tomorrow morning I'll have enough magic to do some serious healing.
Minmax: You just want an excuse to touch me, you big, gay Dwarf.
Forgath: Sigh. Not this again. I'm not gay.
Minmax: Look. Have or have you not had sex with someone who had a beard?
Forgath: Well, yeah, but that's only because female Dwarves can sometimes have...
Minmax: Hey! Hey! I don't wanna hear about your gay exploits!
Forgath: Well, I'm not the one who won't wear pants!
Minmax: What?
Forgath: Nothing.
-
-
-
-
SFX: Krack
Book 2, Chapter 7: There Is No Treasure Chest
Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2013 2:02 pm
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/03182006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Complains of Names: So if we head east for just a day or two, it'll bring us near the Swamp of Silence and everyone know that there are a ton of old dungeon crawls out there.
Chief: I dunno Complains, that route would also bring us dangerously close to Brassmoon City.
Complains: Oh, we'll steer clear of the city and before you know it, we'll be back at the village with a few levels under our belts.
Chief: Well, to be honest, it's not really the city that worries me.
Chief: Dungeon crawls are places designed to kill adventurers in the most creative ways possible.
Complains: I'm sure we can handle it, Chief.
Chief: Oh really. Well let's assume, hypothetically, that you're walking down a dungeon hallway toward a treasure chest at the end...
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Whoa, hey! Why is Complains getting first crack at this chest? He already has two magic items! I wanna be at this chest, too!
SFX: Ca-Click
Chief: Oh for the love of...
Chief: Fumbles, I'm just trying to make a point to Complains, that's all.
Chief: Anyways, suppose you're approaching the chest, and all of a sudden, BOOM, some sort of magical explosive trap goes off. What are you going to do then, huh?
Fumbles (SVK): An explosive trap? I was nowhere near the chest, I'm in another room!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/03192006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Big Ears: There is another room? I search that room with Vorpal, here.
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Hey, good idea.
Chief: Sigh. Thaco, will you please tell these two that they're being idiots?
Thaco: You two are being idiots!
Chief: Thank you.
Thaco: Why are you searching that room when the big treasure is clearly in that chest in the hallway? Why else would it be trapped with explosives?
Big Ears: Oh, you're right
Fumbles (SVK): Yeah, good thinking.
Complains: Uh... Hello! I'm the one who's bleeding to death in the hallway. Isn't anyone going to heal me?
Big Ears: Oh, of course. Chief, I use my paladin magics and go heal ...
Chief: There is no treasure chest!!
-
Complains: So it was an illusion!
Big Ears: This dungeon crawl is hard.
Fumbles (SVK): I attack the darkness!
Book 2, Chapter 8: Kore's Conversation
Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2013 2:08 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/03262006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
-
-
-
-
-
Young and Beautiful: Gasp!
Young and Beautiful: AaAaAaAaA!!
Y&B: Am I... alive?
Kore: I have reanimated you for a short time, evil creature. You are bound by Holy Magics to either perform a single task or answer any number of questions for me. What happened here?
Y&B: We were attacked by a party of adventurers.
Kore: And did any Goblins survive this attack?
Y&B: I don't know. I was killed before the battle ended.
Kore: I assume that this warcamp is a branch from some hidden village?
Y&B: yes.
Kore: What is the location of this village?
Y&B: What?!
Y&B: Oh no, please! The village is peaceful! We raise our young there!
Kore: You are forced to answer, evil creature.
-
Y&B: Eight days south, at the far end of the Bloodrain Forest, you'll find the village hidden amongst the largest trees.
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/03272006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Young and Beautiful: I know who you are. You're the paladin from my vision. The one who's cursed.
Kore: I suffer no curse. I have been gifted in order to complete my mission of destroying all evil. I have chosen this Goblin clan as my current target and I have never failed to eradicate a target before moving onto the next
Y&B: But you're killing innocents as well as evil. How can you do this and still keep your status as a paladin?
Kore: Return to death, evil creature.
-
-
-
Taps: Hey, Asks Nonsense, I managed to gather up some Blackroot. It'll make a great snack for our trip back to the village.
Taps: Were you talking to someone? I thought I heard voices.
Taps: Asks Nonsense?
Book 2, Chapter 9: You're Not Asks
Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2013 2:14 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04012006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
-
SFX: Klink
SFX: Klink
Taps: You're not Asks. Who are you?
Asks Nonsense: There you are, Taps! I was getting worried about ...
Asks: ...you.
Asks: Oh gods. It's an adventurer.
Taps: What!?
Asks: It's an adventurer!
Asks: Run!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04022006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
-
SFX: Tap Tap Tap Tap
-
Asks Nonsense: Aak!
SFX: Kathunk Kathunk Kathunk
SFX: Shwunk
Asks: Oof!
Taps: Huff
Taps: Huff
Taps: Asks?
Taps: Asks!
Asks: Ruuuun!
Lifepoints: -4
Asks: Taps Ruuuuuuuu.....
SFX: Krunch
Taps: Huff
Book 2, Chapter 10: Dies and His New Hand
Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2013 2:20 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04072006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Caption (Dreaming Dies Horribly): Am I dreaming?
Caption: You're giving me a new arm, aren't you? I can tell. There's are weird kind of connection growing because of it. I can see some of the past of your race. A time and place far from here now, where there are others of your kind...
Caption: Hey, is that you?
Caption: Oh wait, that's another of your kind. Duh!
Backgroundstory (told by Dies Horribly): Oh I get it, you travel through different realities looking for other life forms. When you find one that you like, you mimic it physically. But only a little, cause when you shape change beyond your sphere shape, you can't fly. Plus, you can't form any detailed or complex shapes. Eventually, you create a smaller sphere which is made of the same material as you. You attach the new sphere to the creature and then leave. The young sphere spends the next few days copying, but not harming, a fragment of that creature's soul. As it alters its copy of the soul fragment to form its own, unique soul, it gains its own individual colour as well as its own specific weaknesses and strengths. When the task is completed, the youngling separates from the creature as a now living being with it's own, distinctive life force.
The process doesn't hurt the "parent" creature and actually leaves them healthier and slightly stronger than before. Without its soul mimicry, your species would never be able to create new life, since your kind can't form their own souls from scratch.
But you're not performing this whole procedure with me, I can feel it. While you are creating a separate hunk of... whatever you guys are made of, you're not giving it the ability to copy my soul.
Backgroundstory (told by Dies Horribly): Instead, it's becoming a permanent part of my body just like my other limbs. You're not creating new life, you're creating a body part that's animated by my own life force, just like the rest of me. And since it's being altered by the presence of my own soul, it won't share your acidic blood weakness. But I can sense that what you're doing is forbidden by your species. You could be killed for doing this, but you're doing it anyway to save my life! Wow.
Copied soul
Original soul
Shared soul
Dream explained by Dies Horribly: This is weird, usually when I dream, I see beautiful females covered in....
DreamFemale1: Hiya, Dies.
Dreaming Dies Horribly: Oh, there they are.
DreamFemale1: We've spilled mud-honey all over our smooth, naked bodies. Who will lick it off of our soft, wet...
Dies Horribly: Huh?
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04082006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Dies horribly: Ug, I always wake up before the good part.
Dies: Gasp!
Dies: Aah!
SFX: Sh-Ching
Dies: Aaah!
SFX: Sh-Ching
Dies: Aaaah!
SFX: Sh-Ching
Dies: For the love of the gods, watch where I point those sword!
Dies: Okay, think calm thoughts!
Dies: ...calm thoughts... ...calm thoughts...
SFX: Sh-Ching
Dies: Whew.
Dies: Hmmm.
Dies: Maybe I can make it create a shape that isn't so scary.
-
-
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04092006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Dies Horribly: Aaaah!
SFX: Sh-Ching
Dies: ...calm thoughts... ...calm thoughts...
SFX: Sh-Ching
SFX: Klik
Dies: Don't look at me like that. I accidentally created a very scary flower that is extremely poisonous when it's mixes with...
Dies: ...well...
Dies: ...extreme poison.
Dies: I think the hand is subconsciously turning into a weapon when I get scared, in case I need to protect myself or something.
Dies: Geez, this thing could go off at any time! I guess I'd better start using my other hand when I wipe my butt!
Dies: Plus, I'd better get used to using this hand for when I...
Dies: ...well, that's none of your business.
SFX: Klik Klik Klik Klik Klik
Dies: What!
Dies: Scratch an itch! I was gonna say "When I scratch an itch!"
SFX: Klik
Dies: Y'know. For a floating, metal Orb, you sure have a perverted mind!
Book 2, Chapter 11: Fumbles' First Quest
Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2013 3:24 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04152006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
-
Big Ears: Are they still out there?
Complains of Names: Shhhh.
Complains of Names: Yes.
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): Are they still out there?
Big Ears: Hey!
Complains of Names: Sit down and shut up before we all end up on the pointed ends of Elven blades!
Big Ears: You think it's an adventuring party?
Chief: No, there's too many of them. Probably a caravan of some kind.
Names: They're pretty well armed for a caravan.
Fumbles (SVK): I bet they've heard of Senor Vorpal Kickass'o and now they're after me cause they know that if they can kill me, they'll be famous!
Fumbles (SVK): Well if it's a fight they want...
Complains: I doubt that these Elves are after you, Fumbles. It looks like they're just going to pass us by and toward Brassmoon City.
Fumbles: But think of the XP! I bet a battle like that could knock me up to 3rd level and the rest of you up to 2nd!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04162006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Chief: I agree with Complains. We'll hide behind these trees and wait for them to pass us.
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): But...
Chief: That's an order.
Fumbles (SVK): Fine.
Thaco: So now we get our first taste of adventuring and it's spent hiding behind trees.
Complains of Names: Hey, if those Elves have nothing against me, then I have nothing against them.
Thaco: And then there's the fact that they'd kick our butts.
Complains: Well there's that too.
Chief: Quiet, you two!
Elf one: (text to fineprinted to read, but actually it is recognisably text)
Elf two: (same problem here, resolution not sufficient to read, something like "I know" or "I agree")
Complains: Oh no, I can hear someone coming this way!
Chief: Shhh!
Fumbles (SVK) (thinking): I knew it! These heartless adventurers are after me!
Fumbles (SVK): Alright Elven warriors, you face the deadly wrath of...
SFX: Scruunch
Fumbles (SVK): Senor Vorpal...
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04172006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): What?
Fumbles (SVK): No.
Fumbles (SVK): Oh no.
Fumbles (SVK): I...
Fumbles (SVK): ...I didn't know.
Big Ears: Oh Gods!
Fumbles (SVK): I didn't know.
SFX: Thud
Elven Kid 1: Father!
Elven Kid 1: Goblins!
Lifepoints Aldyria: -7
Big Ears: Chief, we need your healing! Now!
Big Ears: We don't have much time!
Chief: I know.
SFX: Chunt
Big Ears: The other youngling is running off to get the other Elves and...
Lifepoints Aldyria: -8
Chief: I know!
Chief: Maglubiyet...
Chief (Magic): Cure Light Wounds!
Elf caravan leader: Ready your bows and blades! Save young Aldyria! No mercy to the murderers!
Chief: Is she okay?
Big Ears: She's gonna live.
Chief: Then we're leaving!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04182006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Elf 1: Do you see anything?
Elf 2: No. but it's this way!
Chief: Now Fumbles! Let's go!
-
Complains of Names: Fumbles?
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): I didn't mean it.
Fumbles (SVK): I didn't mean to...
Fumbles (SVK): Oof!
Elf 1: She's here! Aldyria is over here!
Aldyria: Doll... (coff) My doll!
Elf 1: Is she okay?
Elf 2: She's wounded, but not fatally. Shall we search the area for these Goblins?
Elf 1: No, we have children with us and we don't know how many Goblins there are.
Aldyria: My doll!
Elf 1: There could be hundreds of them. Let's go get Aldyria into a wagon and head to Brassmoon City as quickly as we can. And instruct the children that they are not to wander away from the wagons anymore!
Complains: They're leaving. Gods, that was too close.
Fumbles (SVK): I was no different than the adventurers who've attacked us. I was so concerned about XP that I attacked an innocent youngling.
Complains: Fumbles, you didn't know that she was a ...
Fumbles (SVK): No. I have to make this right. The rest of you don't have to come with me, but I'm going to return her doll to her.
Complains: What? That's crazy! Anyways, you can't catch that caravan now.
Fumbles (SVK): Then I'm going to Brassmoon City!
Book 2, Chapter 12: The Anymug
Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2013 4:48 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04222006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Forgath: Hey Minmax, where are you? Break time is over, it's time to hit the...
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: ...trail? What the hell are you doing?!
Minmax: I got bored waiting for you to "do your business" in the woods, so I'm having some fun.
Forgath: Are you out of your mind!? Get back over here before you kill yourself!
Minmax: Oh relax, the balance check for this log is a difficulty rating of 5. A child could do it. Besides, if I fall, it's only 1D6 damage per 100 feet.
Beltbuckle: I am great
Badge: MM
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: It's 1D6 per 10 feet, you moron!
Minmax: What? Are you sure?
Forgath: Yes!
Minmax: But this is a 350 feet drop. That's...
Badge: MM
Badge: .M
Belt: I am gre
Minmax: 487D6 damage!
Forgath: 35D6 damage.
Minmax: 35D6 damage!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04232006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Minmax: Forgath! Buddy! Ya gotta help me!
Forgath: Sigh.
Forgath: It's a balance check of 5. Just walk back.
Minmax: Oh sure, and fumble, falling to my death! You'd like that, wouldn't you!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: You can't fumble a skill check!
Minmax: Yes you can!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: Look, just use your dwarven telekinesis to float me back to safety!
Forgath: Dwarves don't have telekinesis.
-
Minmax: Why the hell do I adventure with you?!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Y'know, if you're gonna be a baby, then I'll just stand here telling you how stupid you are and there's not a damn thing that you can do about it 'cause you're stuck.
SFX: Thunk
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: OW!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Hey, wait a minute.
Forgath: I never looked at this mug before, but these are dwarven runes!
Forgath: Hey, this is a really powerful magical item!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04242006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Minmax: A powerful magic item? Seriously?
Helmet: This is a helmet
Beltbuckle: I am great
Badge: MM
Buckle: I am great
Badge: MM
Badge: M.
Buckle: I am great
Badge: MM
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Yer an infant, you know that?
Minmax: Yeah, yeah. What's the cup do?
Forgath: Well, it's called an Anymug. I've read about them but I've never actually seen one. The holder of the mug simply has to concentrate on any liquid in existence and the mug instantly fills itself.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: Are you kidding!? You mean to tell me that we now have an unlimited supply of healing potions?
Badge: MM
Forgath: Well no, it can't create magical liquids.
Badge: MM
Minmax: Oh. Well we could still fill molten lava and huck it at monsters and stuff.
Forgath: Nope.
Badge: MM
Forgath: It has to be something that's a liquid in it's natural form and it can't create anything really hot or really cold.
Badge: MM
Minmax: Oh.
Minmax: Well we could...
Forgath: And the type of stone the mug has to be made from is extremely susceptible to acids of any kind, so no.
Minmax: Oh, So it's a useless piece of crap, is what you're saying.
Badge: MM
Forgath: It's not a piece of crap, it's a sophisticated adventuring tool!
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04252006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: Don't you get it? We could drink of the finest Dwarven ales every night! And now we always have clean water to wash our wounds after battle!
Minmax: Hmmm.
Minmax: So if I were to concentrate on say...
Minmax: ... Ogre piss
SFX: Ba-Wumf
Beltbuckle: I am great
Badge: MM
SFX: Sniff Sniff
Minmax: Eeww! Ogre piss!
Badge: MM
Minmax: Oh geez. Sorry 'bout that.
Forgath: Gimme the mug.
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: Don't worry, I'll just summon you some clean water to fix that!
Badge: MM
Beltbuckle: I am
SFX: Ba-Wumf
Badge: MM
Minmax: There ya go, buddy.
Forgath: Thanks, I...
Beltbuckle: I am
SFX: Sniff Sniff
Helmet: This is a helmet
Forgath: That was more Ogre piss!
Helmet: This is a helmet
Minmax: Hee Hee
Forgath: Gimme that piece of crap!
Helmet: T is hel
Minmax: It's not a piece of crap, it's a sophisticated adventuring tool!
Book 2, Chapter 13: The Dungeons Of Brassmoon
Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2013 5:18 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04292006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Chief: Absolutely not!
Chief: Brassmoon City is way too dangerous and we're not going in there to return a toy to some Elf youngling! It's suicide!
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): But I already said that I'd go alone.
Chief: Out of the question!
Big Ears: Chief, if this quest has found him, then maybe we should support...
Thaco: I agree with Chief. No one is going to Brassmoon.
Big Ears: Really Thaco? You agree with Chief?
Complains of Names: No kidding?
Chief: Yeah, I'm pretty shocked myself.
Thaco: There are things within those city walls that no Goblin should ever see. There are horrors that you couldn't imagine and suffering that doesn't end.
Thaco (narrating): About a year ago, Brassmoon was almost overrun by the Orcs of Greyblood. After that close call, the king allowed some of his soldiers to volunteer to become elite, specialized guardians of the city.
Thaco (narrating): A group of violent radicals in charge of protecting the city against what the called "destructive humanoids".
Thaco (narrating): These specially trained guards were granted whatever they needed to become experts on how to kill any race they deemed as "monsters". A large studying facility was built to hold prisoners and allow the elites to learn every weakness of these races.
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/04302006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Thaco (narrating): Deep within these dungeons of Brassmoon are members of many races. Orcs, Ogres, Gnolls and many more, including Goblins.
Thaco (narrating): They learn about us by performing torturous experiments on these creatures. The healthier ones can last months before they finally die.
Thaco (narrating): The captain of this group is a high level ranger whose favoured enemy is Goblins. He's dedicated his life to hunting down our kind and he knows everything there is to know about how to kill us.
Thaco (narrating): They call him the Goblin Slayer.
Thaco: So no one is going to Brassmoon City. No one is getting tied up. No one is....
Chief: Hey, are you okay?
SFX: Shiiingg
Chief: Ah!
Thaco: Oh Gods! Chief I'm sorry! You just... You just startled me.
Thaco: My apologies...
Thaco: ...I just need some sleep I guess.
SFX: Ca-Click
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/05012006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Chief: I think we all need some sleep. Tomorrow we'll head for the Swamp of Silence.
Big Ears: Yawn
-
Big Ears: Vorpal, you gotta stop beating yourself up about this. Those Elves said that the youngling would be alright.
Fumbles (Senor Vorpal Kickass'o): I don't know why I fumble so much. I can't help being a danger to my friends and now that Elf girl.
Fumbles (SVK): I thought that as Senor Vorpal Kickass'o, I could avoid all that, but if I can't make this right...
Fumbles: ... then I'm just Fumbles. I'll always just be Fumbles.
Narrator: The next morning....
-
Big Ears: Oh no.
Text on ground: I have to make this right. I'll meet you all at the village.
Big Ears: Guys, wake up!
Book 2, Chapter 14: The Maze Of Waterfalls
Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2013 5:28 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/05062006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Yodette (previous Player Character Tryst Drow'Den): I still don't get it, Tuck...
Yodette: We're hunting these Goblins cause they're looking for a white terror?
Tuck (previous Player Character: Drasst Don'tsue): Not "a" white terror, the White Terror. And they're not looking for it, they're returning it to power.
Yodette: Geez, when I was a Drow babe, killing Goblins was a lot simpler. There was none of this "White Terror" crap.
Tuck: Yodette. You were never a Drow! For the last freakin time, the three of us were never Drow!
Yodette: Right. I uh... I meant when I had a dream that I was a Drow.
Yodette: Man, I hate starting new characters, it gets confusing.
Tuck: Dammit, Yodette!
Yodette: Um... I meant new careers. Starting this new career as an adventurer is tough.
Baka (previous Player Character: Seth Bainwraith): So what was your career before you became an adventurer?
Yodette: What? Oh... Uh... well...
Baka: You didn't even finish your character background, did you?
Yodette: Yes I did! I just can't be expected to remember every damn detail!
Baka: Then you should write it down on your hand or something.
Tuck: Yeah, just make sure you take your gloves off first, genius.
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/05072006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Yodette: But I'm not wearing gloves.
-
Tuck: What the hell is wrong with you? You're wearing gloves right now!
Yodette: No I'm not! I didn't buy any when I started my character.
Tuck: You bought the Explorer's Outfit! It comes with gloves!
Yodette: It does?
Yodette: Well how am I supposed to know that? I didn't read that part of the outfit description!
Baka: That's the Explorer's Outfit? Is that the whole thing?
Tuck: Each outfit can be altered in appearance to suit that character's style, and you shouldn't talk, Baka. Your outfit is pretty weird too.
Baka: Hey, I'm a Japanese Ninja! This is how my people dress for battle!
Tuck: Sigh. Firstly, you're not a Ninja, you're a Samurai. There's like, a world of difference there. Secondly, how can you be Japanese if there is no such country as Japan?
SFX: Crunch
Baka: Well smart guy, I...
Baka: ...um...
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/05082006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Yodette: Cool, I think you broke Baka.
Baka: Shut-up!
-
Dies Horribly: Oh wow! A firesap tree!
Dies: The sap from this tree glows at night. If you have enough of it, you can glob it onto a stick and make a flameless torch.
Dies: And eating too much of it gives you a tummy ache and makes your poop glow.
Dies: I tell ya, it's a whole new level of creepy when your poop glows.
SFX: Klik
Dies: Okay, we should be reaching the Maze of Waterfalls soon. I can hear it out there. We have to be careful because it's a lot of wet, slippery rocks and no place to hide.
Dies: There's also a cliff around the maze, and if you're not careful, you could fall in without any warn...
SFX: Sh-Ching
Book 2, Chapter 15: The Thornback Clan
Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2013 5:32 am
by Krulle
http://www.goblinscomic.comcomic//05132006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Big Ears: This place gives me the creeps.
Complains of Names: Me too, but a straight line through the Swamp of Silence is our best chance of catching up with Fumbles.
Chief: We're kidding ourselves. He's got an entire night's head start on us.
Big Ears: If that Goblin Slayer hurts him, I'll...
Thaco: You'll do nothing!
Thaco: Didn't you listen to me last night? No Goblin can stand up to him and live. He's a...
Thaco: ...a...
Big Ears: What happened here?
-
Thaco: Careful there, Chief. There're freaking plants growing out of their heads.
Chief: Looks like these weird plants are having a hard time growing in an environment this wet.
Chief: These Orcs were all members of the Thornback clan. Our clan is at peace with them, but I haven't heard from them in months.
Complains: Well you're hearing from them now.
Chief: What?
-
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/05142006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Chief: Good moon to you, Thornback clan. I am Chief, leader of the Clan of...
ZombieOrc: Hisssssss!
Thaco: I have never heard an Orc hiss before.
Big Ears: Me neither.
Chief: I think we should turn around and find another route to Brassmoon City.
Complains of Names: I agree.
ZombieOrc: Hisssssss!
ZombieOrc: Hissss!
ZombieOrc: Hisssssss!
Chief: Oh Sonova crap.
Complains: We don't want any trouble, guys!
Complains: We're just looking for our clanmate, he's...
Complains: Aaaah!
Goblins: Complains!
Complains: Aah!
-
http://www.goblinscomic.com/comic/05152006/ wrote:► Show Spoiler
Big Ears: You get your Orcish hands off of...
Big Ears: Ghaaah!
Chief (Magic): Magic Weapon!
SFX: Foom!
SFX: Crump
ZombieOrc: Hissssssss!
SFX: Splassshhh
SFX: Cra-Runch
Thaco: Allright then.
Thaco: Let's go.